2017: Self Censorship Ends Here

Hey Y’all!

miss jay im backSo. Clearly I’ve taken a SERIOUSLY extended vacation from writing. And before jumping into the opinionated and “weird stuff that interests me” kinda posting that I’m known for, I feel I owe my readers an explanation as to why I’ve been gone so long. And why I think now is the right time to come back.

For those of you who sent emails actually asking if I was ever coming back and why I left, hopefully this is a good start to some of those answers. Hopefully as time unfolds, the other little tidbits I drop along the way might create a clearer picture if this isn’t sufficient. And as always, I answer comments as soon as I get them.

trapped in my body

Source: angelamraz.typepad.com Being a prisoner in your own body and mind is such a frustrating, demoralizing thing.

Shortly before leaving on hiatus, I had written a post on having writers block. At the time, I believed that. I had simply run out of opinions. My life wasn’t big enough anymore, I was so stuck in my boring, lifeless role as a sickly bedridden chick that the only opinions I was qualified to give anymore revolved around whatever TV show I was watching. And I seriously hate writing about the daily life crap. Primarily because I seriously hate reading it (Yeah, now you know why I’m never on facebook…I don’t care that your dog played in a box and your kid threw the peas on the floor for the third time this hour…or vice versa). Now, I look back at that thought process and have to giggle at my own lack of self-realization. Because the truth is that you could bury me under a rock in a cave on Mars with my eyes covered and cotton in my ears for the next 50 years and I’d still manage to come up with an original thought or opinion on some thing or another every hour. And because I’m a millennial (BARELY), I absolutely think that all of my opinions are not only entirely valid, but definitely fascinating and interesting enough to share with the world. And the world will only be so lucky to stumble across my profound, often prophetic-level ramblings.

Now in retrospect I can recognize that my inability to write something I could consider above the level of useless drivel had much more to do with Continue reading

Ruby Rant: Sick of the Parasitic Friends

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I’ve been thinking to myself that perhaps I would have more patience for the ignorant idiots who work at Tim Hortons, for example, and other random strangers, if I cut out the amount of bullshit that I end up having to deal with on a day to day basis from my inner circle. Anybody who is a friend or family member of mine can attest to the fact that I go above and beyond for the people I care about, and will do anything you need, if you really need it, even if it is at my own expense. I don’t have this selfless attitude because I expect anything in return from anybody. To be honest, I’m always there, and always willing to help, because I know what it feels like to have nobody who really cares about you, and nobody to turn to yourself. I never want anybody I care about to ever feel that way if there’s something I can do to make sure that they don’t.

And I ask for very little in return, if ever, because to be frank, I really don’t need to. I do better dealing with, and working through, my problems personally in my own head, I don’t like other people’s input, especially when the wounds are fresh, and I’m absolutely terrible at sharing my Continue reading