
This Valentine’s Day, I think rather than focusing on the things that can make love between the races/cultures different, we should focus on some universal questions that we should all be asking ourselves when we’re evaluating either our relationships this V-Day and celebrating/lamenting our love (lost), or figuring out exactly how to prevent our lack of a significant other cloud our judgment to the point where perhaps we end up doing something we regret.
But really, what is love? Let’s pretend that Valentine’s Day isn’t some bastardized commercially driven holiday. Let’s pretend it’s really all about love. At what point in your life, in your relationships development do you think that you’ve actually attained the kind of love that on some level we all hold up as the standard of perfection? Should it be based on things like extreme actions that you’d be willing to (more…)


So, the other day I was having a conversation with a friend, and as is usual for me, while it was a “catching up on each others lives” conversation, I was also falling into the role of amateur psychologist. You see, after a string of trainwreck relationships that she had jumped into quick and deep, she had finally found someone “normal”. It’s not that in the past she had TRIED to get into relationships with psychotic and/or delusional people who on the surface seemed like normal, stable people but deep down were actually pathological liars, abusive freaks, or just generally slack individuals. No. On the surface, for about five seconds, these failed mates seemed to offer exactly what she was looking for: someone who was stable and established in life, who was done looking for drama and the next party in all the wrong places, and was looking for a like-minded individual to settle down with, raise children, buy a house with a white picket fence, and grow old and gray and happy together. The problem was, technically even sociopaths and child molesters want those things: so finding someone who WANTS something doesn’t really guarantee, on any level, that you find someone who is anywhere near capable of actually PROVIDING you with those things for any extended period of time.