At Home Sick? I Got The Cure For Boredom Right Here…

bad-actingBeing stuck in bed for most of the day, everyday, can get pretty damned boring. I mean, seriously, how much TV and internet can any one person take? Well, considering I have been on bed rest for 5 months now, apparently the answer is “lots”. But, I’ve learned that, in order to make all the mind-numbing, brain-cell-killing activity entertaining it’s best to learn how to appreciate genres of programming you might have shunned before. Especially if you were avoiding such things because the acting, directing, storyline, or whatever else was seriously sub par. For example, my newest little guilty pleasure that helps me stay sane through the exciting life of mattress surfing are awful made-for-TV movies. Specifically the ones they show on the W network between 9-11 AM Monday to Friday.

The story line is slightly different in each movie, but the acting is equally awful. Its like watching a high school play full of Z-list highschool actors and actresses. Nothing about the emotions are even remotely convincing, and the plots are all like really cheesy novels, except really cheesy novels aren’t quite as pathetic only because you don’t have to endure the sufferance of having to see the story come to life. Or perhaps its worse in novel form because then it would take you twice as long to get even half as far through the relatively awful story, while your eyes and brain felt like they were bleeding from being subjected to such inhumane crimes against literacy. And yet I eat it up…every moment of every movie. When I have a doctors appointment or sleep through one of them, I genuinely feel disappointed and go out of my way to find out which movie was playing and when I can catch it again.

Ok, so maybe this sounds sad. And maybe it makes me a slightly more pathetic than average kinda gal *shrugs*. Don’t knock it til you try it. I mean, I would hope that none of you would ever be in the situation that you’d be stuck in bed on medical rest for an extended period of time. BUT in case you ever do, just keep it in mind. Seriously. Even if it’s for a short stint, like a bad flu. I know what you’re thinking, when you have the flu the LAST thing you’d want to do is focus on a movie…but trust me on this one, these movies aren’t of the variety that they require any type of focus, attention, or even to be watched in full. I swear, you can miss an entire hour of the movie, at the beginning, middle, or end and not feel like you missed a thing, other than some forced tears, cheesy soap-opera like drama, and “humour” and “wit” that makes you feel a lot more like deadpanning the screen or frowning in confusion than laughing.

But, it’s like watching a train wreck…you know its awful, you want to look away, but you can’t…you’re fixated on the destruction and are drinking it up as though it brings you a feeling of giddy delight rather than awestruck horror.

I seriously recommend the W network weekday morning movies. Two thumbs up. The entertainment value is priceless, if only because it’ll leave you puzzled as hell, wondering for hours WTF it is that is keeping you so entertained, since it sucks ass so bad.

My advice: Don’t ask ‘why’ just hop on the bus and enjoy the ride!! LOL

Happy Friday y’all, I hope you all have a wonderful weekend. I’m sure me and my whiplash are gonna have a fantastical adventure of a time! lol – yeah right!

Cheers

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