Before I say anything else, let me start off by saying I’m all for Human Rights, as a whole, be it women’s rights, rights for minorities, rights for those with alternate genders, sexualities, religious beliefs, and just about anything that involves the betterment of human kind that does not involve harming or infringing on the rights or well being of others. But that doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to have opinions, nor does believing in everyone having equal rights mean that in some way either I must think exactly anything relating to that group of people and what they do should be not only legal, not only socially acceptable, but should in fact be glorified as the only way to live, and curse those who may think otherwise.
Especially when those thoughts being in conflict would in no way, shape or form harm anyone on any level. And really, it pisses me off to no end that these extremely uninformed, wannabe special, bored losers bastardize a cause to win an argument, to feel superior, or to try and falsely support their unreasonable outrage in a way they feel will somehow end the discussion because they’ve pulled the “be all, end all card”. ESPECIALLY when they are dead wrong, either because they are seriously misinformed, or because they like to intentionally bastardize perfectly good movements so that soon the term becomes white noise that people ignore because they hear it irrelevantly so often about non issues that it seems about as special as using the “drive thru”. Using feminism, and one chicken shit anonymous commenters statement on this previous post of mine on saggy boobage as fuel to my fire, let me illustrate my point.
First I’d like to get some definitions out of the way, in case you yourself are not completely clear on what feminism really means because you are so used to people using the term to apply to any damn thing they want that has anything whatsoever to do with women.
1. the doctrine advocating social, political, and all other rights of women equal to those of men.
2. ( sometimes initial capital letter ) an organized movement for the attainment of such rights for women.
3. feminine character
adjective Sometimes, fem·i·nis·tic.
1. advocating social, political, legal, and economic rights for women equal to those of men.
2. an advocate of such rights
Mi·sog·y·nist [mi-soj-uh-nist, mahy‐]
a person who hates, dislikes, mistrusts, or mistreats women
Definitions taken from
Awesome! Now that we have that cleared up, let’s jump right on in. Because seriously? You think I somehow think women are inferior to men because I think they should wear bras, and because seeing swaying, sagging breasts all around town makes me a little nauseous? OK, let’s clear some things up: my post has nothing to do with hating women or not treating women or men equally – if a man has saggy boobs I would most certainly encourage him to find a man bra with lots of support, or at least wear a shirt baggy enough that they aren’t visibly swaying merrily along to the beat while bouncing off your belly button. In fact, if you want women to be treated like the equal partners they should in life, then emphasizing attention on their boobs in any way is not the way to go…. Whether you have a fantastic rack, bra or not, having the girls on display in a way that forces attention onto them, and not, say, your face (or even better, that big beautiful brain of yours) isn’t going to help anyone take you seriously.
Let’s put this another way. Say you’re speaking to a man who is dressed in a nice fitted top, and there’s a counter between you so you can only see him from the waist up… You’ve probably noticed that he is a good looking guy, but you’re actually listening to what he has to say. Now, say he walks around the counter, and you see that his pants are basically skin tight, but that down his right leg there is a very large, very obvious.. Ummmmmm… pole, hanging half way to his knee. Are you seriously trying to tell me you don’t notice it at all? Lol yeah right, as most people would, you’ve looked down, probably gasped in shock, and quickly averted your eyes – having a difficult time looking him directly in his, or in paying any attention to whatever super interesting conversation you had been riveted to like five seconds ago. Now, your attention is focused on not looking down, obviously, but still catching a glimpse without him noticing… cause your brain needs confirmation of what your eyes just saw. You can’t help it, it’s a natural human tendency.
And I would completely 100% protest any piece of clothing that puts such obvious emphasis on any private part belonging to a man: including but not limited to his penis. Like how I hate when men with man boobs, perky or not, decide to wear anything but a baggier shirt that is made from a thicker material. And speedos for men make me giggle and point. Sorry, but if you’re going to wear something (or not wear something) in public, you have to know that people are going to look at you. And not just at your face. This is why we’ve coined the term “a once over” because when you’re meeting someone new, seeing a friend, or waiting at the bus stop when some random person walks by, you’re going to look at them from head to toe and back up again. Period. And you will automatically take inventory of the little details. If your breasts are locked and loaded, and you’re wearing a respectable shirt, I’ll most likely just noticed the color and style of your shirt and whether it goes with your eyes. If you’ve decided to make your breasts a focal point by allowing them to swing free and wild so that every step you take, move you make, and breath you take has them swinging and jiggling in wild abandon, then even if I don’t want to and am not going out of my way to try, I will invariably end up having my attention drawn to the things gesticulating wildly and not in synch in the middle of your body.
I know many people that from time to time do end up going braless, however they all have the personal pride and public decency to make sure that it is not obvious. So, for example, wearing a sweatshirt over your shirt or wearing several layers, the bottom layer being skin tight so to minimize movement and nipplage, or in a dress or sexy cut top when going out, making sure that the cut, fit, and style of the dress and the material still has enough lifting and masking properties that everyone in the room will not be focused on their chest and the full on headlight beams staring straight at them. I’m sorry but it all comes down to this: if you don’t want to be objectified, if you don’t want to be only noticed because of your looks, body, or clothing, then don’t go out of your way to make a spectacle of yourself. Just because you have the right to wear whatever you want doesn’t give you the right to control what other people do. Including look at you, or judge you based on what you do look like. It is not your god given right to walk through life unobserved, nor is it your god given right to control other people’s beliefs and opinions of the things you do do. The only right you do have is to have no harm come to anyone, including yourself, based on those beliefs and opinions.
Now, let’s next address this whole bastardization of misogyny and feminism. Have you ever met a real woman hater? A real person who honestly has no respect for women, who really thinks women aren’t people, should have little to no rights… A person who really feels that the sum of a woman’s value has to do with the sum of her outside parts, and that she is only useful for cooking or sex? Seriously, either you’ve been terribly sheltered, or, as I said in my reply to you, you enjoy feeling like you’re important and stand for something, even though you know little to nothing about what you pretend to stand for. Please do not ruin the fight for our rights, and please do not marginalize the real battle that women go through to be seen as more than what is on the outside, to have more than their beauty appreciated, to have their intelligence and determination and independence be more desirable than a nice rack and legs for miles. If you disagree with my opinion, or think I’m shallow, fine, say that. But don’t hide under the feminism umbrella because you think it’ll strengthen your position.
A woman’s private parts should be just that: private. No random person who has only seen you in public should be able to describe the outline of your snatch, the color of your nipples, or what shape your breasts are in post-baby. Nor should they be able to tell if your upper thighs or midriff have stretch marks, what color your panties are, or whether you wear boy shorts or thongs. Take some pride in modesty and your appearance, and keep the focus where it should be: above the shoulders, between the ears.
We live in a country where basically anything goes wardrobe wise: fine. You’re entitled to wear what you want… A perfect example is man skirts : and I’m entitled to stare at you and make judgments, or just plain dislike what you wear, whether it’s just cause I find it plain off, because it’s distasteful to me, or because it sends out the wrong message, like I’m a skank with no self-respect. You can dislike reality all you want: at the end of the day, it is what it is, human nature is what it is, and by dressing certain ways or engaging in certain behaviors, you objectify yourself whether you mean to or not. What you do with that information is up to you. When I wear a cleavage top or short shorts, how much of a moron would I have to be to assume that I have the right to have men NOT look. Isn’t that the point of putting your body on display?….to have people look? And if a man tells me I look sexy, wouldn’t it be asinine and foolhardy to label said man a misogynist and anti-feminism? I mean seriously, when you put on sexy clothes, or tight clothes, when you make sure certain parts of your body are impossible to miss, what do you think is going to happen? People should walk with their eyes on the ground at all times unless their eyes are locked firmly onto someone else’s? Pffffffttttt please. If you only want to look sexy for you and your partner, do it at home. Cause once you hit the public, you’re fair game.
And I think this post is the perfect place to branch off and discuss another very important topic: not every piece of clothing was made for everybody, or for every circumstance. I’m a firm believer, because I actually love women and want them to never be a public ridicule, that women who don’t have nice legs shouldn’t wear mini skirts (nor should women over the age of 25, unless you are trying to make people respect you less – or you are going to a club of some sort), if your tummy isn’t tight and toned and flat you shouldn’t wear belly tops, and regardless of your weight and shape, you should always dress age and situation appropriate, unless you’re trying to age yourself and draw negative attention – oh and always wear clothes that fit you. Nobody knows what the size tag says but you and your sales lady, and trust me you’ll look a solid 20-40 pounds heavier and so very very unattractive if you sqqquuuuueeeezzzzeee yourself into those jeans that are five sizes too small. Which leads me to my final point, which is to dress size and body type appropriate, for basically the same reasons. Again, not everything was made with every body type in mind, and there are some things that only look good on a size six and under, some things only chicks with a sexy back or an apple bottom bum can pull off, and some things that only a very voluptuous woman could ever look sexy or sharp in. Period. Again, that’s the reality. Sorry if you don’t like it. But if you choose to ignore it, then don’t go crying later that people stare at or mock or judge you. It’s not because they hate women or think your just an object, it’s because you look ridiculous. OK. Now you’ve been warned.
But of course, feel free to TRULY not care what anyone’s opinion is because you are so comfortable and happy with everything about you and how you are, as long as you don’t go crying “anti-feminist!” When someone tells you that halter tops make you look like a line backer, that at your age the girls need a little more support, or that you’ve made yourself look a solid 5 sizes larger by refusing to wear the size that actually FITS you. I’ve been told that cursing is unlady like. “Thankfully”, I have always answered, “I am certainly not a lady”. I’m a grown ass woman and I’ll do as i please. And for that reason, I continue to, unabashedly, curse like a sailor to this day: if I’m anything, it’s certainly not a quitter.
OK, rant done. Oh yeah, p.s. anonymous crusader, get a life?…wait for it…ok NOOOOOWWWWW I’m done. :-D. Well, except for this:
You guys should really check out that man skirt article that is linked above… The article is rather entertaining, but really, more so, you should check out the wack job comments towards the end… Check out his web site too, it explains so very very much!
Anyway, happy Wednesday!