Ruby Rant: Sick of the Parasitic Friends

image

I’ve been thinking to myself that perhaps I would have more patience for the ignorant idiots who work at Tim Hortons, for example, and other random strangers, if I cut out the amount of bullshit that I end up having to deal with on a day to day basis from my inner circle. Anybody who is a friend or family member of mine can attest to the fact that I go above and beyond for the people I care about, and will do anything you need, if you really need it, even if it is at my own expense. I don’t have this selfless attitude because I expect anything in return from anybody. To be honest, I’m always there, and always willing to help, because I know what it feels like to have nobody who really cares about you, and nobody to turn to yourself. I never want anybody I care about to ever feel that way if there’s something I can do to make sure that they don’t.

And I ask for very little in return, if ever, because to be frank, I really don’t need to. I do better dealing with, and working through, my problems personally in my own head, I don’t like other people’s input, especially when the wounds are fresh, and I’m absolutely terrible at sharing my Continue reading

A Letter To White Moms With Biracial Kids

Dear: White Mothers With Half Black Children,

Gorgeous Braid Up Ain't I prettyI have a beef with some of y’all, and I think it’s high time that I actually address this on my blog. Now, I would like to preface this post by saying I am well aware of the fact that this applies to some black mothers as well, and that it does not apply to ALL white mother’s with half-black children. In fact, although I may have been able to say it a couple decades ago, now I wouldn’t even say that this could apply to the MAJORITY. With the advent of the internet and youtube, and I’m guessing people becoming more educated either before or after giving birth to their biracial children, I actually don’t see some of these things half as often as I used to. Which makes the white mom’s who are still lost and confused stand out like a sore thumb. No more is ignorance an excuse. It’s time to wise up and recognize this basic fact:

Your Kid Running Around With Her Hair A Mess Cuz You Refuse to Learn How to Do it is Sad And Despicable Continue reading

Black LGBT: the second-second-class citizens

Gay Pride Black Eye

Keeping an eye on your pride

I once wrote a post asking you all whether you fear unwittingly hooking up with men/women on the DL. To date, I’m pretty sure it’s the only post I’ve specifically written that deals with the LGBTQ community (correction: I also wrote a post on Ricky Martin way back when, before I actually launched Classic Ruby), and it’s high time that I do another one. And I think it’s especially important that I address social/cultural relations of the black LGBTQ community within the larger black social community as a whole. Something has gone terribly wrong in the equal advancement of black LGBTQ members. Somehow, being black and gay means that somehow you should not be afforded the same advancements in equality and equal rights that the rest of the black folk deserve.

While looking for some background info on this post, I came across an article that addressed my overall feelings about the treatment of the black LGBTQ’s within the larger black community. Check out the article yourself, titled Continue reading

Explanation to the Small-Minded on What Makes an Oreo

Source: www.wemburymarinecentre.org

Source: http://www.wemburymarinecentre.org
Uh ohhh…crab mentality+ green with envy= sure devastation for anyone his fuzzy little eye is stuck on. Beware.

And The Crab Mentality Thickens

Anyone seeing a trend here? If you have no idea what I’m talking about, click here and read part 1. Going back to the depths of slavery and running straight through to the present, there has been division intra-racially based on opportunities and advantages that a black person could be afforded, or not, based solely on the amount of melanin in their skin. And when you mix envy with jealousy, with just a dash of hypocrisy, you get an us vs. them mentality that begins to form. The darker slaves relegated to the fields not only were envious of the lighter skinned slaves who got the advantage of house duty, they plain didn’t trust them. What all were they doing to keep favor with the masters and mistresses? These accusatory thoughts and misgivings would only be magnified when at times they were proven to be true. After all, as a loyal act to their masters/mistresses, the house slave would rat out some wrong-doings of the field hands. It seems based on my research that the opposite was true, and they were more likely, if they could, Continue reading

Slam Sundays: F*** I look like??

This being the last Slam Sunday in our Black History Month saga, I really wanted to end things off with a bang. I wanted to wrap up every important message I have tried to get across, give you all the general message, in five minutes or less. I figured I would have to give you all several videos, each one saying a lil something something to cover the bases. And actually, that’s exactly what I had started out doing. And then I stumbled across this one. Does it mention in direct words ever little point I’ve mentioned in the past month? No. But each individual point by itself doesn’t matter. There’s a common theme to everything that has been written. A general message that I want to send out with this month of posts. There is a general misperception, a general issue, with the perceptions and knowledge about the North American black community, both from within and from the outside looking in. This young woman managed to sum it up so beautifully….man, it was priceless. Seriously. The raw emotion in her voice, in her words, in the tone and delivery and Continue reading

Disagree With Black History Month? Want a White History Month, You Say?

image

I was born and raised in Canada. When I was a child growing up, there was no such thing as Black History Month (it was not official until December 1995, and so it’s first appearance on the Canadian calendars was February 1996- I was in Grade 6 at the time). Nor was there a place in the school curriculum where we learned black history. And there was no magical internet for any child to do an easy “Black History” search and see what came up. As far as I was aware, the only Black slaves to ever exist were the ones who ended up in the U.S., and all the black people in Canada immigrated at some point from the Caribbean, Africa, or the U.S. some time after the last documented war because otherwise, why was it that there were literally no black people in history? In fact, as far as I was aware, there was no such thing as slavery in Canada, either. That was an American thing. I got this understanding because, of the little I was able to retain about slavery from movies like Roots and books I had read, the saving grace to the slaves was the underground railroad, whose final stop was in Canada, where the slaves could be free. Therefore, Canada did not have slaves. It was quite simple to me at the time. And how very, very wrong was I? Continue reading

Everyone Sees Race: Pretending You Don’t Is Ridiculous

erase race, make us all shades of gray

Is the key to erasing racism just erasing race? Erasing acknowledgment of the differences that make us unique? Would the world be better in shades of gray?

I hate when people say they don’t notice race. Of course you do. You’re not blind. Not only can you see the tone of someone’s skin, you can see the differences in their facial features, eye colours, hair textures, heights, and weights. You can hear the differences in tone of voice, accent, inflection, and word choice. You can look at 2 different people with generally the same skin coloring and guess that one is from East Asia, and one is from The Caribbean. There are cues and indications of race written all over us.

Why is it that some people think that saying “I don’t even see race”, or “I don’t even notice the colour of someone’s skin” is somehow complimentary, and is an indication of their lack of racist thoughts? I generally despise when people say that everyone is the same to them. Like somehow, any differences in people’s ancestry or cultural beliefs and values no longer exist. Are you so desperate to be seen as not racist, and so confused on what the definition of racism is, that you’d prefer for the concept of race and/or culture to just be eliminated all-together? Not only is that silly and naïve, but it’s downright insulting.

Race exists. And whether you want to condemn someone based on their race, or make their race disappear because acknowledging it makes you uncomfortable, you’re still expressing prejudice. What is your problem with acknowledging that someone is different from you in some ways? Does the fact that they are different in some ways make them lesser? Continue reading