Hey y’all,

Ok, so this Freaky Friday, in this brutally, brittle cold month of January, with this death virus circling around and claiming people left and right, I feel like it’s high time for a little giggle. So, I’m gonna talk about something we all know is being taken waaayyyyyy too far. If the picture wasn’t clue enough for you, maybe you need a little bit of a vacation, because your attention to detail is a little shot, buddy. And no, the answer isn’t Sesame Street..that’s right, it’s the blight to our society: wearing your PJ’s in public. Now, while I do have a hilarious little video clip later on, this is NOT a joking matter, people. First, we had the craze of the negligee dress and tank top. Then we went the whole other way on the whole bedroom attire in public thing, from female and overly sexy, bordering on slutty, to unisex and damn near sloppy, with pajama bottoms for everyone! And not just to run to the store quickly, or to roll into your 8am class and then run home to actually get dressed like a decent human being before really starting your day. No no. Let’s intentionally make the plan that today, from morning til night, I will be dressed as though I am lounging in front of my TV. With the flu. Because why else would you spend the entire day in your pajamas, even if you’re not leaving home. Have you not heard of jogging pants?

But then the craze became even more ridiculous, just when I had thought that I’d seen it all, the trend dropped wayyyyy down. And I mean that literally, not just figuratively. Because, you guessed it, suddenly our FEET no longer needed proper shoes. I mean, why settle for those hideous, garbage-looking knock-off uggs, which give the comfort and feel of lounging around in your slippers but provide a sturdy sole at least, when you could actually WEAR your REAL slippers, all day long? And again, not those slippers that sort of look like shoes, and just to run out to the store, or to take out the garbage. No no. Let’s wear our super-duper cute and pouffy animal head slippers!!! You know the kind? Soft on the inside, and the outside, feels like comfy clouds, and the perfect warm and toasty treat to slip your dogs into after a long, frosty day out? (Check out Snooki’s pic a few down if you’re not sure…yeah. Those.) Warms them toes up in a jiffy, right? Well, apparently people thought, why wait til I get home? I wanna have warm toes NOW!!!! Never mind that these slippers have no hard sole, and that the whole point of shoes is the hard sole that will protect your feet from such things as glass shards, pebbles, and randomly discarded heroin needles. Never mind that those hard soles also protect your feet from getting wet with whatever remnants of that drunk guys urine that’s still leaking around. Pffftttt, as long as your feet are comfy and you look like a complete jackass, who cares if you catch Hep C or come down with Diptheria, right?

But really, when is enough enough? These are called bed clothes for a reason. Our elders used to frown upon walking out of the house in jogging pants…they were made for JOGGING (same thing with running shoes, for that matter), so if your purpose for stepping out your door wasn’t physical fitness, wearing a sweatsuit was just plain tacky. OK, obviously I don’t agree with that, since the majority of my wardrobe that I bother to wear is comprised of baggy sweats. But I still believe there’s a time and a place for such uber-casual wear. Like, for all I’d prefer to live in sweats for the rest of my life, even if I’m just getting together with some friends for drinks or something, I’ll throw on a pair of jeans. And if I’m going to a nice restaurant, or event, I’ll break out the dress clothes. And generally, whatever I slept in last night (or tend to sleep in, in general) is not something I walk out the door wearing. Oh crap, gotta grab some milk? I whip off whatever house clothes I’m wearing and put on a slightly more presentable sweater and sweatpants, which takes all of five seconds, and out the door I go. Is it really SOOOOO difficult to put on real pants?

And I don’t know about anyone else, but I always wonder to myself about the hygienic factor. I mean, anytime I see someone in their pajama pants, I always assume that, rather than get showered and dressed for the day they had a f^$% it moment and decided that they would far prefer to shower and get ready some time later on that day. Um, ew? Fine, maybe I’m an asshole, but now I’m taking slightly shallower breaths around you, cause I don’t wanna accidentally be upwind of you and catch a whiff of some day-or-two old body odor that will forever have me wary of you and your personal hygiene. And for any of you who will say, no, I’m freshly showered, this is what I CHOSE to wear today, I just have one question. How dumb are you? You mean, you WANT to look like you have no pride in your appearance or in personal care, and you want people to, at a glance, decide you’re lazy and slackerish? Because, yes, that is entirely the vibe you give off by choosing to wear your PJ’s outdoors. Just like chicks who wore those negligee dresses gave off the appearance of being sex-hungry slut bags, who were so nympho that they never changed out of their sex-wear, just to attract more random dong in their travels.

When will the madness stop? Why did it become in style to not give a crap about yourself at all? Sure, it could be argued that the limp, long greasy looking rocker dude hair from the 90’s, or the I haven’t had a chance to shave in 3 days look from the 2000’s, or the torn jeans look that raged in between, are all evidence of the concept that people have always thought it was at least a little cool to look like you don’t care about yourself..at least a little. But I beg to differ. While there were extremes in every other case of people taking it to a level where it was impossible to think they were anything but losers for life, for the most part those things were all part of a style that, when paired with the rest of the look, looked, if not your taste, at least put together and intentional. This whole bedclothes in public fad that just WON’T go away makes everyone look like loser pothead who will always live in mama’s basement, forever and ever, amen.

How far will this trend go? Cause, I’m telling you, there are many, many, styles and shades of footgear and actual outdoor clothing that are so soft and comfy, you’d swear you were in your PJ’s…without the negative fallout of looking like a dirty d-bag. Please, boys and girls. Nobody is telling you that if you’re running out for a quick second that you should dress to the nines. Seriously, if it’s just for a quick second, or you don’t plan on leaving your car at all, fine, be lazy. Keep your PJ’s and slippers on, knowing you’re either going right back home to chill, or to get ready and start your day. But, please, either in groups of crazy people, like yourself, or in groups where you are the only crazy one, do not go to the movies, the restaurant, the mall, the amusement park, etc., in your pajamas. Just stop. The madness has gone on long enough. And really, do you wanna perpetuate the trend where now people of all shapes and sizes and ages no longer feel the need to put on clothes, so they just throw on a housecoat and walk out the door??? Overweight 70 year old, of either sex, naked-as-a-jaybird under there, and a strong updraft catches his robe juuuuussssttt as his belt accidentally loosens…pretty picture? I think not.

Some age-old wisdom about fashion and self…

“Don’t be into trends. Don’t make fashion own you, but you decide what you are, what you want to express by the way you dress and the way you live.”

— Gianni Versace

“Style is a way to say who you are without having to speak” – Rachel Zoe

“Vain trifles as they seem, clothes have, they say, more important offices than to merely keep us warm. They change our view of the world and the world’s view of us.” ― Virginia Woolf, Orlando

This has been a Public Service Announcement from Classic Ruby: Unadulterated.

Now that we’ve gotten the seriousness out of the way *wink wink*, AND have managed to avoid one open-robe or wind-up-the-manskirt pic (just for good measure. Sorry. I just CAN’T stop picking on them!) please allow me to introduce you to my friend who, very often, does things in the moment because she really just couldn’t give a f*#$. And although she always gives me the endorsement that “Ok, I know this girl is totally f&^#%#, but she’s awesome at (X thing)”, I will NOT be a d*** like her, and so I’ll say that although she has moments of clear-out insanity, she’s actually not one of these crazy, all-day in public PJ people. Although I do worry about the slippers at times. And the Adidas tracksuit (you KNOW your attachment to it borders on unhealthy). Actually, in the following video she was having a day, I think it was a migraine, and she just really, really didn’t care. But she illustrates this point beautifully…is this really where you want fashion to lead, guys?

LOL, you see? Is that what you want to see? On EVERYONE!?!? And every kind of robe (think see-through on old granny’s, and thin and gapey for the 13 year old boys who just discovered boobs)??. Think about it.

ANYWHO.

TGIF, which means that we’ve finally conquered one more business-week of winter. Only 10,000 more to go!! Happy Weekend y’all!

Cheers!