Underdressed and Overskanky

Like, really?
Like, really?

“What made her think that that was OK?” my boyfriend says to me as a lady walks by us. I know he’s referring to her, because I had been strenuously restraining my urge to laugh at her, but I know she caught me staring at her with my eyes practically bugging out of my head. I quickly looked away and started thinking about hockey to distract myself to keep from laughing at her, because although she looks crazy-ridiculous, I still don’t wanna be mean. (I know, you’re wondering, ‘Why hockey, Ruby?’. Well, I figured that if guys think about sports to become, umm, less…aroused, then maybe it would work in helping me become less…amused? It was worth a try, in any case).

How to look 20 years older and totally pathetic

‘So what was so funny about her Ruby?’, I’m sure is what you’re now wondering. And no, I’m not mean enough to laugh at someone’s face, unless it’s because they’re wearing ridiculous makeup. It was her outfit. She looked like a baby tramp from her neck down but from her neck up, she was a 40 year old woman desperately wanting to relive her glory days, when men loved her for her body, and not just for her mind. I mean, her body wasn’t so bad…she just looked…ridiculous. Tiny little shorts, belly skin all out (did I mention it’s winter), and even though she was thin enough, her shorts were cutting into her tightly enough that she appeared to have love handles. Oh, and she was wearing a hat (it was kinda like a cheap stripper, 1980’s “jail porn scene” hat) and she was wearing some “I’m a cool biker chick” jacket, although for the life of me I can’t remember if it was jean or leather. I would also like to mention that we were at a bar and it was karaoke night – so everyone else was wearing jeans and a sweater.

Yeah, this is totally appropriate "hanging out" attire

I mean, honestly, what WAS she thinking? Why do some women do that? OK, maybe not to that extreme, but we all know, or see, some women who are always wearing age/event/weather inappropriate gear, and they seem so out of place, and the clothes are so extra tight and scandalous, that you can’t help but think to yourself that she would probably look 10 years younger and whole lot more sexy if she covered up a bit more. OK, a lot more. What is it about some women that makes them feel like they have to dress like wannabe porn stars to be attractive and stand out in a crowd. I mean, maybe it’s just because I have always had a healthy level of self confidence, but I have always been on the side of ‘less is more’.

Oh, I see...DON'T go shopping in a strippers closet for your prom dress

And not that I’m a little priss who thinks that showing skin is some abomination and will set the women’s rights movement back by a decade (I can’t stand those women – sorry if you happen to be one of them). Just because you want to flaunt your sexual attractiveness sometimes doesn’t mean that you don’t respect yourself, and don’t expect respect from others. Anyone who knows me knows that at times (OK, more often than I like to admit) I am a cleavage junkie. I like my boobs, and I like putting them on display. However, if I wear a low cut top, the rest of me is covered. Otherwise, when I look in the mirror, I get the distinct impression that I’m not looking at myself but rather at my stripper-alter-ego. Showcasing cleavage, tummy, ass and legs is serious overkill, and sends the message that not only do you have a low self esteem, but that you like to take strangers home with you after a few drinks. Especially when the place and time clearly don’t call for that kind of get-up. Just saying.


10 thoughts on “Underdressed and Overskanky

  1. agreed, but this happens all too much..

    and your idea about sports?!!! trust me, when things get hot enough to pop were not thinking about no sports!!!! were thinking about our naked grandmother…


  2. @ J
    Seriously? Naked grandmother? Lol….never heard of that one, although I can see why that would be MUCH more effective than sports…of course, the long term psychological damage that would come along with too many of those images floating around in your head…..


  3. im bout ta print this shit off an hand it out round tha city, for real tho! Why don’t these females realize just cause we wanna see Beyonce in that getup don’t mean we want YOU in it…she spends 5 hours a day working out, you spend 10 on your couch…talk about lost in translation.

    I don’t do the sports thang neither…I imagine Gilbert Grape’s mom in a G-String in my bed…and I gotta service her ugghhhh!!


  4. So true Kinetic, so true. Maybe you can get bars to hook one of their TV screens up to a computer and upload this post for them 😉

    Gilbert Grape’s mom?? Wow, I haven’t even thought of that movie in decades!


  5. I was wondering if you ever thought of changing the structure
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    1. Funny that I’ve just responded to a reply on another post that has asked me to write more and post media less lol. What can I say? Everything ain’t for everybody. I have some posts that are simply littered with media with few supporting lines of text, some crammed full of videos, some short posts, and some that are basically all text with very little media. At the end of the day, when I create the post, I put the emphasis on what I feel is most important given the message, while trying to keep in mind other factors. But really, I’m a writer, and my primary and preferred mode of expression is written word.

      Thanks for reading, and thanks for the feedback and compliments. I hope you take the time to peruse my other posts: if you prefer more media, you may prefer posts that are under Slam Saturdays/Sundays, or humor, which often have a much more equal proportion of word to media- or the media wins out in the balance.


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