I would like to think that I’m the kinda gal that doesn’t buy into superficial consumerist holidays. So does my mother. And, since I’m most certainly my mother’s child (some of the time! lol) I’m pretty certain that it’s her general attitude towards holidays and the fact that celebrating them on that day is entirely irrelevant, that it would mean JUST as much to celebrate the week before or after society decides to officially launch said holiday, is the basis for my thought processes. But, here’e the thing. I don’t need the whole kit-and-kaboodle on Valentine’s Day, let’s say, because quite frankly at least 50% of people in society (or at least the one’s that I see in society) are single and therefore NOT going to be involved in the V-Day festivities. So, even if all I get is a little cuddle or a phone call that says “Happy Valentines Day! I love you baby!” from my man, at least I HAVE a man and GOT a call. Now, the thing with these consumerist holidays is that they’re pretty much what I like to call a pissing contest. Oh yeah, you got a dozen roses? I got 24 long-stemmed roses, suckka!! Y’all went to Alice Fazooli’s?? My Man took me to the Keg.
But, it must be said, as always, that just because I don’t personally feel the need to be in competion with the world in regards to what was done for me and how much love that proves my SO has for me, it doesn’t mean that I don’t feel super special when I get beautiful roses, a wonderful dinner, and some type of shiny/flashy gift on V-Day. Why not? I wouldn’t say that he loves me LESS if he doesn’t bother to get me anything other than a card and a smile…but I might think I was more deeply implanted in his mind if he went so far out of his way to make me smile on a day that was created for love (or to boost the economy at a dead time…lol). But, while I think I will always be vaguely reasonable at least with my V-Day expectations, I don’t think the same would hold true about Mother’s Day. Seriously. I don’t care what any woman who has a child says, she wants to be celebrated on Mother’s Day. It’s the one time each year when her tireless selflessness and devotion to her children is appreciated and she’s actually given a pat on the back. As her children get older and leave the nest, Mother’s Day is a time to remember your poor forgotten mother and honour her before you return back to your own life and your once-daily quick check in phone calls with her.
And, quite frankly, while I don’t think that Mother’s Day is any less consumeristic than V-Day, I do feel as though it is slightly more deserved (well, alot more actually). And as much as what your Mom gets from you on Mother’s Day will be used in pissing contest fashion (oh, your son got you a 32 inch flat screen tv? My daughter got me a 72 inch lcd wall mount flatscreen tv!), it actually comes from deeper roots. The contest amongst Mom’s is not just about how much their kid loves or fears them, it also has some to do with how well they raised their children to honour their parents, and how well of a job they did making sure their children went out into the world with a solid foundation, so that they are not only able to afford ridiculous extravagancies, but also that their hearts are absolutely dying for an opportunity to lavish their mother’s with such things, as we are all aware there is no such thing as finding adequate or accurate words to describe how thankful and blessed you are to have the love of a good mother. In short, there is an underlying understanding that your mother will get exactly what her blood, sweat, and tears have earned her over the years of mothering you.
Now, I must clarify that especially on Mother’s Day, the thought actually does count for more than the price. Your seven year old working dilligently for hours upon hours making you the absolutely perfect picture all while barracading you from their room like they are reviewing private CIA intelligence files is worth billions more than some store bought card with their name printed neatly at the bottom. The same goes as we get older, only the thought has to mature and grow older as we do. For example, I made my mother (hey now, don’t judge me…it was freakin’ awesome and she loved it) a kinda collage/plaque thing, I surprised her by showing up at her church (even though she knows I have no way to get around and am in a lot of pain) and then took her out to lunch. She was expecting literally nothing from me this Mother’s Day, not even to see me. I knew that that would NEVER happen, but I had to surprise her. When we talked about Mother’s Day, she made her regular mentions of us being able to do it before or after the day, that it wasn’t necessary to do it on the day because it doesn’t mean any less if it’s on some other day. I didn’t take the bait. Of course not. She wanted me to make a plan. I already had one, I just wasn’t telling her a damn thing about it!
Of course, she cried (tears of joy, of course) at least 10 times yesterday. I could see the joy she felt in her heart, how special and loved she felt. Most importantly, I could see in her eyes that she knew I would do anything for her, that she truly was, is, and will always be my heart. That I love her more than life itself. And that gift, more than anything, was the one I wanted to give her this Mother’s Day. And trust me, I know that for this year, at least, she wins the pissing contest, hands down.
I love you Mommy, Happy Mother’s Day!!
And Happy Mother’s Day to each and every Mother out there!! I hope you were all honoured and were shown the love and affection and appreciation that you deserved!!
Happy Monday Y’all!!